The Briar Patch

I need to shave it has been a few weeks getting a little hairy. I have my first massage ever in Canada today, my acupuntrurist said she hasn't seen a back as tight as mine before. In Mexico it was great however I had to poop after hoping that isn't the case again. Actually been pretty lazy for the last couple weeks spent more time playing Batman than writing or anything useful. I am re doing the whole Arkham series except Knight cause I don't have that one and yes a single tears falls down my face when I think about it. Asylum might be my fav since the riddles are riddles and it is fun to solve! On the Batman front I will admit I had a few doubts about Heath as the Joker but he nailed it! Flip side was I had some faith cause he was a phenomenal actor. But Affleck I dunno, he has the Bruce Wayne look down but I just have this feeling.... Not a good one, one like when you need to poop but your driving down the highway in the middle of minus 40 with not washrooms for hours. Bu...

Old Korn rocks, listening to their first album as I write. So whats new in my life? Well thanks for asking. I turned 34. without much for bells and whistles. I find as I get older my birthday means less. I mean when your a kid its great. Presents, parties, cakes. From like 18 to 31, it was all about the party. Be it in a bar, a strip club or even at the lake birthdays meant hangovers. Now a nice dinner out and a quiet fire is enough. I have been back from Disney for a month and I miss the hell outta it. That was a fackin fun trip! So as I get rich I will be back there. My insano neighbour asked for 24 hours notice before I have backyard fires. I am tempted to have 1 every night now. My mind is working on 3 stories. Well 2 stories and a comic. The first issue of the comic is almost done just needs typed and maybe I could for once try to submit something. Conner McDavid is all that Edmonton is about. Seriously, just stop. I hope to hell the kid pans out but stop putting the dreams of a...

Ah hockey, the game I love another season has wrapped up. So this is my annual wrap up. That's a lie I have never done a wrap up, but here is my thoughts. The fackin Blackhawks won again. At this point whether I like 'em or not is irrelevant. I may have to admit the are becoming a modern dynasty. As much as I hate Kane I like Toews so I guess it is good with the bad. Just know Patrick your on the list with Kayne. The nut kicking list. It would be pretty sweet to see L.A win again next year. Then it would be like 2 dynasty's fighting. The big thing though I wanna yap about is Connor McDavid. Nope not even lets start with the Oilers. 3 first over all picks then 2 in the top 5?? And still a bottom feeder. Tavaeres, Stamkos, Crosby, Ovi, Toews & Fruity Kane were all top picks that have turned their teams around. Don't say they went to better teams either. What is the problem in Oil City? I mean yes we could use Pronger back. Boo me all you want he was a winner! Cant b...

Friday, the final day and back to Disneyland. I didn’t think I would become a stickler but I am. I do think that they should be called what they are Disney and Cali. I mean we had hopper passes but never did hop. So really you can go to Cali and never step in Disneyland. But that isn’t really important. So I don’t know if it was cause it was Friday but the bus was packed. The whole thing is to have two buses on one line so people aren’t waiting. So stagger them!!! It drove me mental the whole time that both buses ran side by side. Here is another side rant. If you work at Disney be fucking happy. Some people are just crabby and if that’s you don’t work at Disney. This comes from a ticket taker not validating my pass right. It did some strange ding which my girlfriend noticed. I said don’t worry no one will let you in without it being right. Turns out I was wrong. My girlfriends was valid and I wasn’t. So even though this ticket taker knew my shit wasn’t valid she let us through. D...

So we started off Thursday with a buffet again. I gotta say, starting the day off with custom omelette's is the way to go. The fruit really wasn’t all that great considering we are in Cali but oh well. So it was cold. I have heard the term June gloom when you cant see the sun and we were getting it. We tried to go on Toy story mania again but it was crazy busy so we played some games. Won a couple small stuffies. Unlike a real carnival I guess you cant upgrade! Then we went to soaring over California. The line was half an hour, which wasn’t bad. Listening to the trailer park folk behind me was mind numbingly painful though. Seriously, a chunky white dude in line trying to teach his 5 year old boxing combos. Oh ya and tattoos and a tank top. Like seriously wtf. My personal fav was him whining about how season pass holders don’t get treated well enough. Ya they should get treated well but I think a huge chunk of Disney's revenue comes from suckers like us who come down and...

So California Adventures! Day 2 in the parks, day 3 here. We started with a buffet breakfast, that is the way to go in my mind on trips like this. Now first thing in the park we were told get your fast pass for cars. Well we didn't, we simply braved the 45 minutes line for the ride. Did it live up to the hype. Yup. It has both the Disney story elements and the speed of a good ride. AND they did the set really well. At this point it is cars or Indy for my top ride. On the way out of Carsland we did Maters tow. It is more a kids ride but gotta get them all in. Then we kinda wandered around to see the park. We were going to do the Monsters inc ride when they guy gave us a Buddy pass?? For some reason we got to line cut, not complaining about that but a few people ahead of us wondered WTF. Also it is a decent ride but it is just a story ride. We then did flics flight which is another kiddie ride. Ariel's adventure is a good story ride, a lot of detail. However I am noticing kid r...

So today was the magic morning. For first timers like me what that is, is getting into the park 1 hours before opening. What that means really is hurry up and wait. BUT before we even get there we hop on the bus, getting excited on my way to Mickey! Then a family comes on. I shouldn't judge my mommy told me not too but both the mom and grandma are in scooters. My thoughts are mean. Then they have to lift up seats and strap these scooters in. Well they cant park them and after watching the struggle I go manually push it into the straps so we can freakin get this shit on the road. We finally hit the park gates... First off, there is a lot of magic morning cards and of course everyone wants in early. So the line up isn't small but it isn't big either. However of course in front of us is a family that doesn't understand the magic morning is an extra and didn't pay for it but wants in and is arguing with the ticket taker. Switch lines bada boom bada bing in. Mind is blow...