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Edmonton year 1

The great adventure started June 28th 2000. Shwa, Ditch and I drove down to Edmonton  in my beat up car. We booked in a hotel in downtown and started our house hunt by visiting my cousin, Auntie Glos kid who lived here. We had circled a bunch of places in the classified and showed them to her. She scribbled them all out and said not in those areas. There was a reason they were cheap. She helped us find more and we spend the next day and a half looking and applying. We honestly got our heart set on one place. We nicknamed it Melrose Place, you 90s people will get it. Everyone was young and pretty and seemed to know each other. June 29th was my 19th birthday. So that night we went out to Whyte Ave! We had at least 10 applications out and we celebrated our asses off. Then reality crashed in.

The 30th I got up and realized I was out of something. I don't even remember what, it was like pitstick or something so I got dressed left the hotel and started walking downtown. Then some lady hands me a $5. I said whats up? I wasn't like sitting or pan handling I was just walking and she said it was her good deed to help people. I said I was just out to buy something. So she asked why my shirt was inside out. I felt stupid and should have seen this as a sign.

Here is the rube. (I love old timey sayings like that) People won't rent if you have no rental history but how can you rent if no one will rent to you? Even Melrose said no. So our last day, hungover we were on the hunt again. (You know it as a good party if you got a hangover at 19) I think a man took pity on us on our last day we got a 2 bedroom in the Oliver district for $600! Imagine a place for $600 now.


So ya there it is. We went home, packed and came back July 15th. That was the saddest day I think I ever had and the most exciting. We at first had hand me down furniture my uncle D had given me and our TV stand was a milk crate we stole from behind a restaurant.  We were living the dream. Since it is now August, it has been 17 years just under half my life I have lived in Edmonton. Wanna know the truth, it let me down at the start.

I grew up in Grande Prairie,while I do feel a swell of pride for my people we aren't the artsy types. The Artist (see last blog!) had lent me The Vampire Lestat, I thought Edmonton would be like Gay Pari. I thought every cafe would be full of political and philosophical talk. I love YEG but it really is only a big version of GP. Ya there might be more art and junk here but I didn't find it. I found momre of the same just in a bigger setting.

I started looking for a job. I was not picky, I put out resumes and applications everywhere. The first place to get back to me was the now closed Sawmill in Oliver Square. The chef was a giant D bag. The entire interview was Can you cook fast?? Yes I can. How fast? Umm as fast as the oven. How fast?? In the end he said okay the job was mine, I said no thanks I couldn't see myself working there. So he was mad I wasted his time but oh well.

I was about to lose hope when I got a call. If you live in or know the Ingewood area of Edmonton, you know there was only really 1 franchise restaurant. It was the same franchise I had worked for in GP. The owner called me in for an interview to ask if I had worked in GP for real. I said ya, he said I could have the job just on that. I guess GP was the busiest one around, so I would be a good asset with my experience in a hectic environment. I am going to put it out there this was another life changing place. A good chunk of this story from now on happened because of this place. Some good and some bad. The owner, well we had our ups and our downs. He has been nice and helped me out, he has also been kind of a douche. I say douche a lot, I might need a new word. I guess you can decide, but I got the job. Here was the shit though. Pay was $6.25. I was making almost $4 less than I had in high school. And now I had actual bills.

Lets start with my kitchen co-workers. There was Red Seal, he was a red seal chef. I have no idea why he chose to be in that kitchen. Shy Guy, he wasn't actually shy just quiet and naturally good at everything. You know those people who are just good at shit like everything, but the modest ones not the cocky asses. There was the Old Man, he had been there forever and I think might still be there. The Wrestler, all this guy did was get wasted, play video games and watch WWE. A few weeks after me they started Black. We will get back to Black. He is another big influence, but when I met him he was just a goofy looking goth kid. A few months after that came the Programmer, he is another important one but we will get back to all them.

Here is another life Truth, the work world has gotten cold. It used to be hard work got you places. Good bosses noticed and offered raises without asking. That's how it was when I started out. Then something changed. Now you have to claw for everything. That in turn makes bitter employees who don't feel appreciated. Who then don't work as hard. The cycle of shit carries on.

The Artist came down for the Fringe Festival, just before school started. It was a fun couple of days. This time we actually slept in the same bed, nothing happened but my futon I moved out with really wasn't comfy! The actual truth was it was the last time I was really honestly happy for awhile. I thought I was but I wasn't really ready to move out yet. It was like when Luke goes off to fight Vader and Yoda say ready you are not. I wasn't, I wasn't mature enough to A) Be in non structured school B) Act like an adult in the real world. I probably shouldn't have moved out for another year, but I was hard headed and or foolish, so I moved.

School proved both my points of not being ready. First off, the courses I liked I did well in. It may seem silly but I loved Children's Lit.  Then I had the bitch. Let me digress, you may have a doctorate. I still don't think your a doctor. Doctors are the men who gave my brother my moms kidney. You studied literature, you don't save lives. You ain't a doctor. I know my grammar and spelling is awful. This chick was a cunt about it. Sorry to any women that offends. But she was, I started to hate school. And living with Ditch and Shwa was terrible. They would do something fun, like go to the water park. I would tag along, fuck school and fuck that cow. See not really mature enough to be going to school. Plus I saw that there was money in my bank. Student loans, that I could use to pay for things.... Not mature enough to be a functioning adult.

Lets meet the front end staff at my work. There was the skank, all she wanted to do was party. She was dragging down a Pretty One. She was my age, all the guys had a crush on her. There was the Mother. She was about my moms age and actually was good to talk to for advice. There was the Normal Woman. But there was 2 that would keep coming up Party Girl and Heartache.

At first I wanted to hang out with Skank, cause she was like the gateway to hanging out with Pretty Girl. And they did take me out one night. It was great until Skank figured pretty girl should hang out with a different guy. So Skank kicked me out, not really kicked me out but said party was over. But left one guy there. So I was stranded at 3 am in a city I didn't know. I hated Skank after that.

As a side note don't move in with a couple. At least not when they first move out. You become a third wheel. They wanna play house and it sucks. After awhile I am sure it changes but hell they couldn't even shower separately. And if they fight well then they both ask you whose side your on. If you argue with one of them, then it is an argument with both. Not that Shwa and Ditch weren't and aren't still good friends, but moving in together that was silly.

I had two escapes. The first was chat. Who remembers Excite? I think it was before yahoo. I spent hours on it. I even "met" someone. Now not really met, she was from South Carolina. But we chatted everyday. She was into the same music, books, TV. Had she have been in Edmonton or even close I a sure we woulda met. But she wasn't of course as time went on and I got to know real people we talked less. In fact until I started this I hadn't thought of her in years. I wonder what she is up to now... Thar was the first escape. Also it was before snapchat so no there is no dick pics of me out there. Don't get yer hopes up!

Second was Party Girl. She loved to party, like every night. Once her shift was done, drinks were flowing. Days off it was time to hit bars. She also hated Skank and after I bitched about her we started to have drinks. Often. The second part of that is I put too much into a shit job. The boss started to ask me to work more hours and later, I should have said no I have school BUT, he would come with..... I could really use the help. SO I would crack. Then work till 10 or 11. Then Party would say have a quick one to unwind but that would be two an then it would be late when I got home. No time to study just to bed.

So the first semester ended. I wasn't failing but it was by the skin of my teeth. I started the next semester and knew it was going to be the same, so I made a choice. A bad one, I quit. I went to the program chair and said I needed some time off. I wanted to come back next year and start again. He said of course. Here is where things get fucky. I said can this semesters tuition be put towards next year? He said of course and that was the end of it. I thought he would take care of it. I guess I should have went to the administration but I didn't. We will get back to that.

Want another life truth? It's really basic, something true that you learned years ago. Never judge a book by its cover. I have met people who have lotsa dollars. I have slept in apartments, with people who have no money not even furniture. I know really good people and have met some other nasty people. In the end actions speak louder than words and looks can be very deceiving.

I started working full time, which meant every night I would sit with Party. Plus I started hanging around with Red Seal and Shy Guy after work. We often would go to essies, everyone remember essies? It was a frickin institution back in the day.

The fact was I was way more home sick than I would admit. I would go home almost every long weekend. I loved and hated when my family would come to visit. Love is pretty easy to see why. Hate cause of two things. First they came a bunch because of my brothers condition. He had to come by almost every month for a check up. Medical reasons are not why you want people to come. And second every time they visited they had to leave and that sucked.

I can't remember the reason but our lease was up before the year was over. I was getting my own place. Something I didn't understand was Ditch wanted his own place too. Not cause they were having problems just cause Ditch waned to try living alone. I ended up in the shittiest shit hole! The paint was peeling off the walls. All the knobs were 15 degrees out on the stove. The chain lock was put in upside down so it was pretty much useless. But the price as right. First week or so little white boy me is sitting playing Nintendo when my door opens and this big black dude walks in. He sits down and smiles at me. You should really lock your doors he tells me. Pretty sure I stuttered some response and then he starts laughing. He introduced himself but said I really should lock my door. He was my neighbor and asked if I wanted to go biking sometime as he saw that was mainly how I got around. We did become friendly but we never did go biking. I also started locking my door.



This was 107ave just past the cemetery. I only lived there for about 6 months. While I was there they found a body in a dumpster a block away. More often then not on my bike ride home at midnight or later hookers offered me whatever for a few bucks. I started to leave empties outside cause well someone would grab them. It didn't really bug me that much, I would have stayed but Shwa came by one night upset. She hadn't budgeted right and couldn't afford her place. Ditch still had a lease so she hoped we could rent a place together again. So we found a townhouse in Sherbrooke. Oh but before we get to the townhouse my car got stolen. EPS you let me down. I admit, it wasn't insured or registered cause I wasn't driving. And it was still the one that was rolled so it looked like shit. But I call the cops and they said sure we will look into it but since it isn't registered or insured it isn't a high priority. I didn't hear anything for a week or two then walking home one day sitting down an alley I see my car. I had my keys, hopped in and drove home.

I did an old blog if you look back about my best birthday ever. It did happen in shitty shit hole actually. Evil and DB came down for the weekend. Viscous had moved here. Black from work had started hanging out. Shwa had friends in. It was a huge party, hell Party Girl slept with the Matt Good bands guitarist that weekend. It was an awesome weekend. For a bit my home sickness left

A good thing did happen, I never really smoked that much pot. If someone offered I didn't say no, but I am not sure if I ever even bought my own. Anyways Party and I were smoking with this regular one night and I had a bad reaction. Like real bad, for hours I thought I was having heart attacks. She dropped me at Ditch's at like 3 in the morning. Once I calmed down and vowed never to smoke again. I mean yes I have but maybe once every 3 years now. so that was a good thing in the long run??

But this one has run longer than I expected. So I am gonna cut it off at year 1 and do another......

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